Jacob's Ladder

This is a profound and moving work, possibly unique in the history of literature. It is not a work of fiction. Rather, it is a true and faithful testimony to a decision, the biggest decision that any person can take, the decision to die by one's own hand. The poet and novelist Colin Mackay decided, calmly and rationally, in early 2002, that he would commit suicide eighteen months later, on his 52nd birthday. This short diary, Colin's final piece of writing, articulates in lucid and literary prose his thoughts, feelings, laments, reflections, fears and hopes over the nine weeks leading up to the day of his suicide. One chapter was written each week, and the final chapter was composed on the day itself. Colin made sure that by the time Online Originals received the manuscript, it was too late to intervene. Because what Colin wanted more than anything was to have appreciative readers of his work, we took the decision to publish and distribute Jacob's Ladder for free to a global audience. Although some readers may be upset or offended by its nature and authenticity, others will find, in Colin's rational resolution to end his tormented life, the very essence of humanity.