Quest for You: A New Adult Parody

Coming spring 2014 Archer Riddick isn’t who you think he is. If you thought he was a hot beta hero with a bruised heart, you’d be right. But he’s also other things. Things that are secret. Things you’ll never guess, not in a million years, oh no, ahahaha ahahaha ahahahahahahaaaa. His secrets were always buried beneath a heap of well-adjusted spunky man beast, but now that he’s trying to woo Enid, his lifelong friend, the darned things are just getting in the way. Plus Enid’s a whore and Archer’s a virgin, and he can’t shake the horny but disturbing idea that he’s an untried young knight and she’s a wizened pagan prostitute, or something. Then comes the opportunity he’s been waiting for: an invitation to the world’s best re-enactment fayre at a clichéd castle in England. Archer knows there’s no better place to seduce a girl, and before they know it, the gang are off to stay at Hunter von Styles’ country pile in Salisbury. But will Archer win Enid’s heart? Will Enid tolerate the rehashed storylines? And will Sparkles von Fancypants the unicorn survive an eight hour flight with no internet?